


Robbed

by XIntensity_After_DarkX (XIntensity_FallsX)



Series: Radiodust collection [1]
Category: Hazbin Hotel (Web Series)
Genre: Adult Language, Asexual Character, Assault, Humor, Kissing, M/M, Robbery, Violence, blindfolds but not used sexually, handcuffs but not used sexually, mentions of a kinky club, radiodust - Freeform, some scary elements, sorry this fic is not very exciting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-27
Updated: 2019-03-27
Packaged: 2019-12-18 13:38:18
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,957
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18250949
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/XIntensity_FallsX/pseuds/XIntensity_After_DarkX
Summary: Angel spends his last day at the club he dances at getting robbed by the owner. Unfortunately, that money was for the hotel. Rather than tell Charlie or Vaggie, he enlists Alastor to help him try to get it back, and the two go on an adventure together.





	Robbed

**Author's Note:**

> Notes: Okay so. Yeah. I have no idea if these are how these characters will turn out, given that the pilot isn’t out yet. So uh, sorry if these guys are really out of character. I did my best, and I hope this was entertaining! It was refreshing to write, for sure.

Clip, clip, clip. 

Just like the tick, tick, tick coming from the discarded pocket watch resting on the nearby side table.  

The clip, clip, clips were coming closer, delivered at a steady pace, and rapidly drowning out the soft tick. The clips rounded the corner, coming down the hallway, echoing beyond the closed door. Alastor slowly lowered the book to rest in his lap, folded his hands on top of it, and watched patiently. The door to the study swung open, striking the wall with a sudden boom.  

There stood Angel, one leg still extended from a kick. He recoiled it with a huff, pointing straight at Alastor. His outfit was mostly ripped, his right eye swollen shut, and two of his gloves were missing. He sucked in a deep breath, one that made the fluff on his chest swell up like an angry bird. Glaring and with a curled upper lip, he uttered one simple, agonized and drawn out word. “ _YOU.”_  

The word and the vehemence it was delivered in made Alastor’s ears twitch. “Why hello, Angel. I’d ask how your day went, but I’m assuming it wasn’t all bees and butterflies.” 

Angel’s boots clipped furiously on the floor, as best as he could with a noticeable limp. He swatted Alastor’s book off of his lap, and sat down where it used to be, folding a pair of arms over his chest. The other pair pinned Alastor’s wrists to the chair. 

The white hot fury in Angel’s eyes was enough not to shove him off of his lap. ‘ _Is this pity_ _or curiosity_ _?’_  He squinted at  Angel,  his eyes focused on his good eye. ‘ _Perhaps a bit of both_ _. What a strange sensati_ _on._ _’_ Tears  began to  spil l  down from Angel’s eye, and  Alastor blinked _._ Angel did not weigh much, but now he was sitting on him  _and_  emotional. “Ah, do I need to remind you about the five-foot rule?” 

Angel fisted the front of his jacket, bowing his head until all Alastor saw was the fluff of the back of his head. “Listen, you asshole. I need your help.” 

“You have a very  _unique_  way of asking for it, I must say. ...I suppose I’ll bite. What happened?” 

“I got robbed!” The words came out in an angry, muffled wail. “All the money I made tonight—Gone, all gone! I wanted to use it to help the hotel, ya know- do a good deed or somethin’ stupid Charlie’s always goin’ on about!” 

Alastor’s eyes widened briefly, and then narrowed. He settled back into his chair, and reached for his staff. With the microphone end of it, he nudged Angel’s chin upward so they were eye to eye. “You have my attention. Start from the beginning.” 

Angel wiped his arm across his face, taking his tears along for the ride. “It was my last night doin’ the whole pole dancing thing. I made a grand, a solid grand. The best I’ve ever made my whole time there, and ya know what? It felt really good. Like, not the usual way pole dancing makes me feel-” 

“-Let’s skip that description.” 

“Oh right. You don’t do sex. Sorry. Anyway, I gathered up all the money. I called Charlie to tell her in all, and then I went to go pick up the rest of the dough in Tanner’s office. That’s the guy who owes the club. He gives us some hourly money, and normally I wouldn’t have bad things to say about him until he jumped me and robbed me of all the cash I had.” He gritted his teeth, and clenched his eye shut. He took a few quick breaths, as if trying to calm himself down. “I ain’t that strong like this. You think these extra limbs would do some good or somethin’. News flash! They don’t. He beat the hell out of me, and laughed. Said he needed to get somethin’ good out of me for leaving for the hotel, and make sure I don’t perform anywhere else.” He rubbed at his good eye, grinding away at fresh tears. “I didn’t want to let Charlie down. I can’t tell her what happened. What if her and Vaggie try and go get the money back? I don’t want them in that club.” 

“So you want  _me_ in that club?” 

“Well...” Angel bit his bottom lip. “Since you’re sponsoring the place in all... I figured you’d have a vested interest in helpin’. And besides, do  _you_  want them to go there?” 

“...An excellent point. You’re very correct, Angel. I don’t want them to go there.” 

“An’... an’ you’re some kind of all-powerful whatever the fuck, right? If you’re as bad as Vaggie says you are, roughing up some piece of shit should be like nothin’ at all.” 

Alastor stared at Angel, who still had his hands wrenched in his jacket as he stared right back with a hopeful look. He sighed, wrenching his hands free from Angel’s grip. “You make a hard case to ignore. And should I not act as a responsible sponsor to someone who is actively trying to help better the place, I would be doing a disservice to the hotel and Charlie herself. I’ll help you get your mon-oooofh!” Angel’s head was suddenly buried in his chest, followed by a long stream of repeated thank yous. “ _ANGEL. THE FIVE-FOOT RULE.”_  

 _“_ There you are!” Charlie’s voice filled the room. She stood in the door, smiling brightly at them with Vaggie just behind her. Angel tensed up immediately, and grabbed Alastor’s jacket again.  

“Don’t tell her.” He hissed out and kept his face hidden in Alastor’s chest. “She’ll want to go, lie or somethin’.” 

The desperate whisper met Alastor’s ears, and he allowed the words to sink in. Since when did Angel become so perceptive? “Ah, Charlie. Vaggie. My dears, how are you this evening?” 

“Oh, we’re fine! We heard your voices and thought we’d say hi.” 

“What’s wrong with him?” Vaggie pointed to Angel, who bristled. 

“Oh ah- He had a tough last day at the club. A few of his belongings are still there, and I’m going with him to collect them.” 

“That’s... surprisingly helpful.” Vaggie crossed her arms over her chest. " _Especially_ for _you_.” 

Charlie nudged Vaggie. “That IS helpful, AND nice of you. Thank you, Alastor! Angel, I’m sorry about your day. Is there anything we can do to help?” 

“It’s fine! I’m fine.” He waved one of his arms. “Don’t even worry about it, toots. Al’s got it, he offered to help.” 

“Uh-huh. Something’s up here.” Vaggie narrowed her eye at Alastor, who merely smiled and shrugged his shoulder. “You don’t even like Angel, I know he annoys the piss out of you. Why in the name of hell would you ever want to help?” 

“My dear girl, I don’t have the slightest idea of what you mean. Angel  _challenges_ me, he doesn’t annoy me. ...Well.  _Most_ of the time. And as a sponsor of this hotel, I simply wish to do my part. Perhaps I’m a touch old fashioned, but I don’t believe two ladies such as yourselves, who are perfectly capable I might add of handling such a task, should have to sully themselves doing this particular errand.” 

“Yeah, I don’t want ya to go there. We won’t be gone too long. I’m already feelin’ pretty stupid leavin’ my shit behind. I don’t need a whole party of four wastin’ their time on this.” 

“If... if you say so. We’ll just hang out here then.” Charlie said and shrugged her shoulder. She tugged gently on Vaggie’s arm. “You see, he’s helping.” 

As Vaggie was pulled away, she kept her gaze leveled on Alastor. He gave her his best toothy smile and a wave. Once the doorway was clear, he tapped Angel on his shoulder. “They’re gone. Please get off of me.” 

“But you  _smell_ really good. Just give me like, a minute more.” 

With a shove, Angel was on the floor. Alastor quickly, wordlessly passed by him. “H-hey! Wait up, Al! You don’t even know where the club is, unless there’s something you ain’t tellin’ me!”  

- 

Angel’s boots made the same  _clip_ _clip_ _clip_ sounds on the street as they did in the hotel, though there was a bit of a delay between them. Though on the rough sidewalk, the heel striking the pavement echoed far more than it did on the wooden floor. It filled the air of the empty street, and increased when Angel tried hobbling after him. No matter how quickly he tried to close the gap, Alastor was several steps ahead. “I appreciate your urgency Al, but could ya slow down a little? I can’t walk as fast with this fucked up leg.” 

Without bothering to look over his shoulder, or stopping his pace. “Why don’t you go back to the hotel, Angel? I can do this myself.” 

“W-what? No! This is my mess, I’m gonna help clean it up! Do you even have any idea of how hard it was to actually come to you for help? I don’t ask anyone for help, ever! The hell if I’m going to let you take care of my problem without some kind of assistance me! And besides, you can’t even go into my room without violently cringing. How the hell are you going to go into a sex club, let alone navigate it? It ain’t just visual, babe. It’s full of sounds and smel-” 

Alastor stopped suddenly. “-You have a point.” 

“Look, I know you’re uncomfortable by sex stuff. An’ I’m a little sorry I hit on you all the time, but I don’t expect you to reciprocate or anything like that. I like flirtin’ and you’re smokin’ hot. You’re totally my type. Completely unobtainable.” 

Alastor let out a surpised bark of laughter. “Angel, you’re quite the character. Even in this sisuation.” 

“Regardless I uh, I know nothin’ will ever happen between us. That’s okay. I like havin’ you as a friend- even though I’m eighty-nine percent sure you don’t actually like me. But uh, I can get laid any time, I don’t have many friends. So... please let me come. I can make sure you don’t see stuff you don’t want to see. You’ll smell it though. It’s kinda unavoidable as I didn’t bring a bag. If you go there alone, you’ll be real upset. Or whatever you feel about full on sex. And sex acts. Oh! And tonight’s fetish night! We have that guy performing with the balloon-” 

“Stop.” He raised his hand sharply. “That’s enough. You’ve sold me. How are you going to get me in where I see minimal acts of debauchery?” 

Angel pulled off his ruined top, grabbed a pair of handcuffs he kept in the inside pocket, and began to shred it into long strips. “You’re gonna have to do what I say, but I’ll make sure you see approximately  _no_ acts of debauchery. Even though it might seem crazy, it’s pretty damn foolproof if I do say so myself!” 

“I immediately hate this plan.” 

“Heh. I knew you would. Can you lend me your jacket? I promise you it’s part of the plan.” 

Alastor stared long and hard at Angel. Slowly, and with his eyes never leaving him, he removed his long, red jacket. “Be careful with it, would you? It’s tailored.” 

“Yeah, yeah. Don’t worry. I won’t be out of your site. Well, until I blindfold you. Oh, how do you feel about handcuffs?” He asked and dangled a pair of them from his finger tip. The only answer he received was a lengthy, punishing glare and a curved, dangerous smile. “Not great, okay. I see your point but hear me out. I handcuff you to me, and then we won’t get separated.” 

Alastor rubbed his temples, letting out a low chuckle. “So. You want me to be blindfolded and handcuffed to you. You’re asking for an  _extreme_ amount of trust from me.” 

“If you’re blindfolded, you won’t see anything!” Angel threw up all sets of his hands. “And you’re handcuffed to me so I won’t lose ya! Which is real easy, because everyone’s going to be all hot and bothered. You just happen to be hot AND bothered, so... I don’t feel all that great about the thought of us getting separated.” He tapped the side of his head. “Everything has a good reason. Pretty smart, huh.”  

Alastor made a long, winding, and laced with static sigh. He thrust out his arm. “Let’s get this over with. The sooner this hell is done, the sooner I can get back to forgetting this happened.” 

- 

Alastor assumed the outside of the club was gaudy and overbearing without having to look at it. The buzz of too many cheap lights and the slow, steady hum of illuminated signs told him the story he needed to know. Angel spent the rest of the walk babbling on about something he stopped paying attention to at least ten minutes ago. He could not put out the sound of Angel’s limp, with the  _clip_ _clip_ _clip_  sounds of his boots having a now sizable gap between steps.When they came to a full stop, his nose wrinkled. A soft, pungent aroma wafted through the humid air, hanging around him like a shroud.  

“Hey fuckface.” Angel said and Alastor assumed it was done with a sneer. “Let me in. I’m a customer now.” 

“Oh yeah? You just left like two hours ago.” The other voice had to be a bouncer, or some other guard. It was a gruff sound, as if whomever it was spent most of their time in hell smoking far too many cigarettes. “Nice coat. Must be new. And who the hell is Red here? He looks familiar.”  

“Him? He’s my date. You think I’d come to fetish night alone? That ain’t my kink, babe. Ya gonna let us in or not?” 

“Yeah yeah, go on in. You know the rules.” 

Alastor heard the clink of something metal, and felt Angel tugging on his arm to follow. The heavy door shut behind him, and the odd smell from outside hit him, flooding his senses and making him want to gag. Sounds from left and right bombarded him. Loud, lengthy moans and the heavy sound of flesh slapping against flesh, something wet, and the odd balloon pop pulsed in his ears. He froze in place despite the constant tug from Angel. 

He remembered deer from when he was human. Specifically, when he was driving at night. Any time he happened across one, they froze in the bright beam of his headlights as if they did not know what to do. If the club was quieter, he assumed his gulp would have been audible. Someone let out a loud, lengthy moan right beside him. Every part of him was screaming inside of him to keep going, to get away. His feet had other plans, rooting themselves directly into the ground. 

“Al? Hey.” Angel’s boots scraped against the floor, but Alastor was not sure in with direction he was moving in, until he felt hands trying to block his ears. “I’m sorry, I didn’t know the sound would be so bad for you. But we gotta move or it won’t get any better. There’s a hallway by his office. Once we get over there, it’s gonna be so much better.” His voice held a note of worry, one that made Alastor pause in thought. A second set of Angel’s hands were grasping his. Oddly, he assumed Angel was trying to smile reassuringly at him. He felt his legs begin to respond again, following in the direction he was being pulled in. 

Eventually they stopped. The sounds were far more distant and muffled, and the stench lingered only briefly. Angel removed his hands from his ears and hands, then gently removed the blindfold. Alastor squinted briefly, his eyes slowly adjusting to the light.  

“What was that... that vile  _smell_? I’ve never smelt anything rotten and sweet at the same time before, I wanted to gag!”  

“Oh. Oh yeah, that. Believe me Al, you do  _not_  want to know. Heh, the things you become nose blind to. Anyway ah... Are... are you okay? You locked up on me back there.” 

“I’m always dandy, Angel. Nothing more, nothing less.” He said through a gritted smile. 

“Al, I’m real sorry. I shouldn’t have asked you to come here. I didn’t know you were this uncomfortable by sex, sometimes I take for granted that it’s nothin’ for me. It’s a thing I do, like ridin’ a bike or somethin’. But you don’t like sex, and I took you to a sex club!” He ran a set of hands down his face. “Ugh, I am so  _stupid_. And this is exactly why I got like, no friends.” 

“Angel, it’s  _fine._  I suppose I could have mentally prepared myself for this better, but I didn’t. I suppose I should raise my  ‘bothered by debauchery’ level  up a notch or two. I am really glad you blindfolded me. That actually  _was_ a good plan, despite my initial objections.” 

A wide smile spread across Angel’s face. “Yeah? I did good?” 

“Yes, you did. Now. Where is his office?”  

“This way!” Angel made a brief gesture to further down the hallway. “We’ll have to be careful. I’m sure the bouncer alerted the staff to me being here, and I don’t really want them getting in our way. He didn’t seem to recognize you though. Maybe you’re not as big of a deal as Vaggie said.” He grinned at him. 

Alastor merely smiled, and shrugged a shoulder.  

“I’m pretty pleased it’s been going so well... Eh... Except for exposing you to things you’d rather not hear. Or smell. After seeing your reaction back there, I know how adverse to it you all but I gotta know. And ah... I’m sorry if it brings up bad things, but is there a  _reason_ why you don’t like sex? I need to know exactly how much of a shithead I need to feel like for takin’ you here.” 

“Oh, no. It’s nothing like that.” Alastor said quickly. “I simply don’t feel sexual attraction, and I personally don’t enjoy such vulgar displays of sex acts. It makes me uncomfortable.” 

“O-oh. D-do I make you uncomfortable?” 

“Yes.” 

Silence slowly fell over them as they walked. For a moment, only the  _clip, clip, clip_  of Angel’s boots, and the near quiet footfalls from Alastor filled the hallway. However, the pace of Angel’s steps was growing steadily worse, one foot striking the floor heavier while the other stepped gingerly. When Alastor glanced at him, he instantly stood up straighter, trying to walk as normally as he could.  

Angel rubbed at one of his arms, keeping his eyes cast downward. The handcuff chain dangled between them, casting a long shadow before them. Angel cleared his throat, and unclipped the cuff from Alastor’s wrist. “I’m sorry, Al. And I mean that with every part a me. I don’t want to make my friends uncomfortable.” 

Alastor sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. “Angel, it’s alright. I don’t hate you for making me uncomfortable, and you’re always going to do that, as that’s the person you are. I don’t necessarily want you to  _change_ , as you’re not boring. You simply work my nerves over a bit easier than most.” 

“Oh. ...Should I be flattered or offended?” 

Alastor gave a sudden laugh. “That is  _entirely_  up to you, Angel.” 

“Hm. I’m going to be flattered. You don’t want me to change.” He swung his hip out, bumping Alastor in the side, causing him to stumble off course. “You  _like_ me!” 

Despite everything, he laughed again and corrected his course. “I wouldn’t go that far.” 

“You  _tolerate_ me!” 

“That’s better.” He stopped fast which made Angel collide into him, and then he went rigid. His ears twitched briefly. “Someone’s coming-” 

Angel’s arms were around him faster than he could fathom. Angel’s back went up against the wall, and Alastor brought his arms up on the wall to brace himself against the sudden movement. Still, their two foreheads clunked together. Two of Angel’s hands cupped the side of his face. “Shh, pretend like we’re kissing, they’ll leave us be.”  

“ _What? EXCUSE ME?”_ Angel’s face was close to his, enough to feel his soft breath on his lips. The two sets of footsteps were close now, too close for Alastor to think of something better than being far too close to Angel. His warmth and fluffy chest were pressed seamlessly against him. Worse yet, he felt the throb from Angel’s injured hip and leg. It was a steady, deep throb, enough for him to know just how painful it must have felt to walk on it. His eyes must have softened enough to catch Angel’s attention. Before Angel could speak, the loud voices of the guards boomed off the hallway walls. 

“And that’s when I said ‘You can’t fit that up there’! And then she says-” 

“Whoa, hold up. Look at those two. Can’t blame them for wanting a quiet place. It’s a zoo out there!”  

“I’ll say! Get it, Big Red!” The security guard reached out and slapped Alastor hard enough on the ass that it made him jolt forward, right in to Angel. Both guards laughed and continued on their way, leaving Alastor stunned, his lips full flush against Angel’s. He knew his eyes must have been huge, he had never felt them go that wide before. Angel did not move, he was as rigid as Alastor was, meeting his wide-eyed stare with his good eye. The two pairs of arms immediately released him, and were thrown against the wall to keep from touching the other demon. 

Slowly, Alastor pulled back. His face felt like it was burning, yet he could not look away from him.  

“T-that wasn’t supposed to happen.” He babbled out. “Al, I never wanted that to happen to you- We weren’t supposed to...! Oh, fuck- would ya say something? How about ‘Angel, the five-mile rule or whatever’. Somethin’! You’re killin’ me!” 

Alastor said nothing. He leaned over and pressed his lips against Angel’s once more. It was soft, so soft it was barely there. Angel’s four hands hit the wall, like he was caught doing something he shouldn’t. As the second passed into five, and then ten more, one by one, his hands fell upon Alastor again. A set on his shoulders. Another on his hips. Nearly thirty seconds ticked by, and Angel’s eye shut.  

Alastor’s hands eventually left the wall, and rested on Angel’s shoulders. He slowly parted from him, his lips dragging away with the slightest gesture. He remained close, his lips still brushing Angel’s. “It’s five  _feet_ , Angel.” 

“Asshole.” Angel groaned out and gripped his shirt, pulling him down into a third kiss. His arms pulled him as close as he could, holding on and never wanting to let go. Kissing Alastor made his head swim. No one had ever kissed him just to kiss him before. Most did it briefly before they got grabby, as a courtesy. Alastor kept his hands right on his shoulders. The more he tried to deepen it, Alastor remained firm about kissing him back respectfully. When they parted, Angel reached down and took his hands. “You kiss me like a... well, wrong word but... like a person.” One of his hands rubbed at the back of his neck. “You wanna keep going after we get the money back? Ya know, celebrate? I could be kissed like that for the rest of my life.” 

“I don’t-- Angel. All of this is a  _lot_ for me.” He ran a hand through his hair. “We can revisit this later. Come on.” He offered his arm to him. “I know your leg is bothering you. Take my arm.” 

“It ain’t! It’s fine. I only bitched about it earlier, because you were walkin’ too fast.” He huffed and threw his arms over his chest and waist. “I can do it myself just fine without your help.” 

“I don’t think any less of you for taking my arm, mind you. You’re trying to hide your limp and I felt your leg throbbing-” 

“That was my dick! Clearly my dick is in my leg. Yeah. That’s how spiders work.” 

“Angel, stop it.” Alastor’s voice went hard, despite the smile on his face. “You came all this way, determined to help get the money back, and you’re doing it without complaining. I want to help you. Please allow me to do so.” 

Angel’s fingers twitched. He eyed Alastor’s arm, and then looked to his face. “O-okay. Fine. But for the record, I’m one hundred damn percent fine.” He reached out and wrapped his arms around the offered one.  

Once they started walking, Alastor spoke up. “...What exactly happened when this man, Tanner, robbed you?” 

“Mmph. Look, it’s not like I went down like some punk. Like I said earlier, I went back to collect his money, and Tanner was sittin’ behind the desk, just like usual. So far so good. Sounds normal, right?” 

“Yes, please continue.” 

“So he paid me out. Took his sweet time too. One bill, one at a time, slow as fuck. I shoulda knew somethin’ was wrong, but I was so damn pleased to take a cool grand to the hotel, I wasn’t thinking straight. I grabbed up the stack, shoved it in my fluff and turned my back on the guy. That was a mistake. He jumped me! Beat the shit out of me with a damn baseball bat. He went right for my hip and leg, before I could kick him off. I did get a chance to get in a few good licks of my own... before he punched my eye in with a pair of brass knuckles.” He pressed his hand against it. “I lost consciousness, and when I came to, my money was gone!” 

“I see.”  

Angel gave him a sideways glance out of his good eye.“Yeah yeah, no big deal. I get it.” 

Alastor pressed a finger to Angel’s lips. “Just because I don’t react openly, doesn’t mean I’m not reacting at all. What happened to you will be avenged, don’t worry.” He came to a stop, gesturing to a large door at the end of the hallway. “Is that his office?” 

“Yeah, that’s it. You ready to throw down, Al?”  

“In not so many words, yes.” 

“Great!” Angel let go of his arm, pounding on the door with two sets of fists. “Hey! Hey, asshole! Open the fuck up!” When the door did not open, he huffed and yanked on the door knob. The door bounced off the wall with a loud bang. He entered, his chest puffed up, and fists clenched. “Gimmie back my money, or I’ll beat your ugly ass face in!” 

The club owner behind the desk was a thick man, with arms nearly ten times the width of Angel’s body. He was rather guerilla like, an apparent reflection of the man he used to be when he was alive. He leaned over the desk, propping his thick on to his meaty hand with a wide grin. “Yeah? With one bad leg, and one good eye, complete with spindly little arms? Give it up sweetheart, that money’s already spent. You can’t just leave the club for some weird happy ending in a hotel. That’s not how this works.” 

“No! You’re wrong!” Angel pointed fiercely at the man’s barrel chest. “You don’t get to rob me! I brought back up, so you better be ponying up that cash right now!” 

The chair creaked as he leaned the to the left, and then to the right. “Huh. Who's your back up? You, yourself and you again? That’s all see.” 

Angel whipped around to look behind him. Alastor was gone. “...A-Al?” His arms dropped, and he frowned deeply. “Wh-where did he go?” 

“Hah! You don’t seem to get it. No one’s  _friends_ down here! No one cares about anyone else but themselves, and  _no one_  cares about whores. They take what they want from scraps of flesh like yourself and leave im’ by the wayside.”  

Angel’s eye drooped and he looked toward the door. Alastor was right behind him when he busted in through the door. “...Al...?” 

“Hey, don’t look so sad, sweetheart. Everyone double crosses everyone down here. I suppose I shoulda squashed you the first time, but I didn’t have a newspaper big enough. Still don’t.” Tanner reached for the baseball bat resting beside his desk, still smeared with Angel’s blood. “Ah well, you’re better acquainted with this. Nice knowing ya, kid!” 

Angel turned from the door in time to bring up his arms to protect his face. The bat never reached him. It hung over his head, as the loud crackle of the radio caught both of their attention. 

“ _Evening, folks! Welcome to a surprise broadcast, brought to you by your favorite radio demon_!” 

Tanner put down the bat, and laughed loudly. “What a night! A thousand bucks and my favorite radio program?! As I live and die, look at the luck on me!” 

Angel’s eye followed the plug, noting the device was not plugged into the wall. He picked it up. “Al?” His voice was soft. The dials immediately pointed at him. Angel hugged the back of the radio to his chest, and took a step back. 

“ _Tonight’s guest star is a real special sort of filth. The kind you dream about scraping of the bottom of your shoe on the nearest curb. Tonight’s_ _guest star_ _has no problem robbing a monetary gift from a non-profit organization! Tonight’s_ _guest star_ _managed to harm a good amount of demons with one selfish, violent act. Tonight’s_ _guest star_ _is getting exactly what’s coming to him.”_  

 _“_ Whoa, ho _._ Someone’s going to wasted tonight! Hate to be that guy!” 

Angel took as sizable a step back from Tanner as much as his leg would allow. The air around the room began to crackle as if being filled with static. Alastor gave a hearty chuckle. “ _Folks, it’s time to introduce our guest of honor tonight, let’s give a warm, final welcome to Tanner!”_  

Angel should have enjoyed all the color draining from Tanner’s face. Instead, he clutched the radio closer to him. The little radio began to hum and pulse as Tanner flailed backward, trying to make it over his desk. Smoke began to pour out the front of the radio, and the ever-increasing static made every hair on Angel’s body stand on end. The radio’s front exploded, propelling Angel backward and on to the floor. The last thing he saw before blacking out was the distorted shape of Alastor looming over Tanner, and a loud crunch.  

- 

Tanner had Angel’s money stuffed in a safe with a few expensive cigars and some good liquor. Alastor grabbed only the cash, and made his way over to Angel. He knelt down beside him, patting his cheek. “Come on, Angel. It’s time to get up.” 

“Nngh.” He squinted his eyes further shut, moaned, and then opened them up slowly. His eye went wide. “Not you!” He scrambled backward away from Alastor. “Y-you!” 

Alastor’s face softened. “Me.” 

“D-d-d-did you eat him?!” He asked and pointed an accusatory finger right at Alastor’s chest. 

“Oh, no. I broke him in half. It was easy, he was top heavy.” 

“A-a-a-a-are y-y-ya gonna break me in half when I go too far one of these days?! We all know that’s comin’! I’d be even easier to snap, oh god. How the ever-loving fuck are you even that powerful?! You disappear, possess a radio, explode out of nowhere and  _snap a guy in half._  Who even are you?!  _What_ are you?!” 

Alastor should have been pleased. Angel was now cowering up against the wall, the furthest apart he had ever been when in the same room with him. By all rights, he was never going to bother him again. And yet, he nearly frowned. “Angel-” 

“Don’t Angel me! Y-you have every reason in the world to kill me!”  

“I don’t want to kill you. And... I honestly didn’t want to scare you either. Killing Tanner was my best option, I’m sorry for frightening you. You wanted my help, and this is what I do.” 

Angel kept pressing against the back wall, keeping his good leg in front of him. “Yeah, okay- you’re just like Vaggie said you were. Bu-but why the fuck  _don’t_  you want to kill me?! I annoy you on a minute by minute basis!” 

Alastor let out a long sigh. “You’re going to make me say it, aren’t you?” 

“Huh? S-s-say what?” 

“Fine, fine. I don’t want to kill you because you’re my  _friend_ , Angel. And I don’t just tolerate you, I actually  _like_  you a little. If you were dead, I’d be remarkably less annoyed, but much more bored. Now come on, let’s get out of here before he begins to smell.” He stood up, offering his hand to help Angel to his feet. 

Angel eyed the hand, glancing up to Alastor’s face. He squinted his eye at him. The smile on his face was the smallest he had ever seen, and his eyebrows were knitted together in a kind of concern he almost wished he had a picture of. Slowly, he raised his hand and took the offered one. Alastor hauled him up to his feet. He wobbled unsteadily, standing on one leg. “I ah... I’m glad we’re friends. And even though you scared the shit out of me, thank you for savin’ my neck. I don’t know how quick I would have come back from another beat down. Now, let’s go home and give the money to the girls! The club should be empty after your ‘performance’. Unless that’s someone’s kink, or whatever.” He turned away from Alastor and began to hop on one leg toward the door. 

“Angel.” Alastor cleared his throat. “On one leg?” 

“Yeah, I’m a regular hopscotch champ. You should ask my sister. I’ll be home in no time.” He grinned at him, but it faded based on the annoyed smile Alastor gave him. “Or uh, not.” 

- 

When Charlie opened the hotel’s door, she did not expect Alastor standing on the porch with Angel on his back, inexplicably wearing Alastor’s signature red coat.  

“Sorry for bothering you, Charlie! But Angel couldn’t reach the door and I have my hands full.” When she stepped aside, he strolled in.  

“Here’s money!” Angel thrust out the stack of money out to her. “All one thousand bucks of it!” 

Charlie took the money, her mouth opening and then shutting. Vaggie stood beside her and instantly frowned. “What the fuck happened to you?” 

“It got a little dicey at the club, because of course it did. I’m not going back there so who the hell cares? Al came to my rescue. It’s all fine.” 

“I’m going to drop Angel off at his room to get cleaned up. We won’t be bothering you for the rest of the evening, that is... unless you want to know what happened. If so, you know where I’ll be. Thank you for opening the door!” Alastor gave them a cheerful smile, and made his way up the stairs.  

Once they were out of earshot, Vaggie shook her head. “I still don’t trust that guy, he's way too powerful to want to help with something like this. I don’t know what you see in him.”  

Charlie continued to stare after Angel and Alastor, not blinking. She cleared her throat and began climbing the stairs after them. “I-I ah... I  _think_ I just saw him giving Angel a piggy-back ride.” 

End.


End file.
